December 2nd

Welcome to a new month here on The Chris Gesualdi Experience. For those of you who keep asking me where the content on my page is, pay attention. This site for now mostly just acts as my blog, meaning I write about how terribly interesting my life is, and all of you slowly learn to appreciate and worship me. Like, Wil Wheaton, or Becky. Yeah, it's exciting.

Anyway, today we got our new class assignments. I have Mr. Moran for A Period study hall, which is good because I absolutely hate Mr. Moran. I don't know how to describe it. It's just an unexplainable rage that builds up inside me whenever he talks. Maybe I just hate Math, or old people or something. He's also completely senile. On no less than two occassions, he has said "Dog ate your mittens eh?" when someone forgot their homework. Dog Ate Your Mittens. I mean, it doesn't take a genius to step back and realize "Wait, I must've said that wrong because it makes no sense whatsoever." But not Mr. Moran, because even when I suggest that he might've meant "Dog ate your homework," he tells me "No, no, It's an old saying." Well, it must be pretty fucking old because at least I know no one in the history of the internet has ever said "dog ate your mittens."

All my other new teachers seem ok. I got Mr. Minks for Oral Communication, and I have to write a three page story about my partner Max. He's writing about me fighting in Vietnam. Not the pussy Vietnam either, the one in space. Vietnam 20XX (I just like saying "Twenty Exty Ex"). And my social studies teacher Ms. Mafi seems... you know, I keep seeing the word lesbian in my head but I know it isn't the right one. She doesn't seem to like Rob Moss, Scott and I constantly cracking jokes though. The thing is that we've been making fun of all our other teachers for a whole trimester now, now we finally get some new material, it's like a breath of fresh air. Speaking of new material, Ms. Mafi would be hot if it wasn't for the giant god damn gap in her teeth. Zing! It's times like these I'm glad no one reads this page.

I'm assuming that someone in one of Mr. Larsheveque's computer graphics class will notice my poster and visit this page. Let me just tell you that Mr. Larsheveque probobly hates you already, and that you will most likely spend more time listening to him talk about how much he hates his life than you will actually picking up skills. If he starts talking about his butterflies, run, and if he tries to show you his pride and joy, the Butterfly King video, burn the VCR. The high point of this man's life was making a nature video in college, and everything has just been one painful downhill slide from there. It's just sad to watch.

Ahh, I'm just kidding Mr. Larsheveque, I love you and your radio show which I have gone out of my way never to listen to. And your class has taught me how to insert my picture into porn images for use in witty internet forum arguements. If that picture offends you than it's doing its intended purpose.

Oh yeah, and programming in Java is painfully complicated and hurts my head. The worst part is that my teacher is Nina Koch, who taught BASIC last year. The only fond memories I have of that class was that Ms. Koch has like, some disability where she can't look at things that flash without almost having a seizure, which is a good thing for a BASIC teacher to have considering that 99% of all BASIC programs flash in one way or another. Howard had a lot of fun making the most blindingly frantic jumbles of colors in a hope to knock her out. Howard is a terrible person.

Also, I made this in photoshop. It made me feel really cool. And no I didn't draw the girl, I just stole her from some doujin. It still looks cool though. And Josh says we can name our band Crucked, which makes me very happy.

Cruck you later kids.