January 29th - Penis Monsters

So, the site was down. Many people made sure I was aware of that fact. Many of you liked the picture of the Japanese girl hanging herself. It just goes to show you that the Japanese can make nearly anything cute, be it suicide, pedophilia, or that scary ass Sadako girl from "The Ring." I know it's been said numberous times, but I love the Japanese!

Anyways, I recently got this PS2 game called "Magic Pengel." It's a pretty standard monster battling RPG. The big selling point though, is that you can create your own 3D monsters just by drawing a crude 2D image. Naturally, the second I heard about this feature, my head was filled with thoughts of creating an entire army of penis monsters. So far, me and John Carey have made several variations on the "Giant Penis Monster," model. My favorite one is Olly, who we gave horribly deformed legs and an angry face. I think John's favorite was "Blackie," who is appropriately, a big black man with a gigantic snake-like penis. Immature? Maybe. Hilarious? Yes.

Also, I really wish my scanner worked because I have all this random propaganda to scan in. First is that Daily Hampshire Gazette article, which quotes me maybe 2 times. Also, some FBLA related materials for me to make fun of. The latest issue of Sex Etc. (Unfortunately it pales compared to last issue, but there's this picture of a kid with a condom for a head that makes up for all of it). And you know, other stuff like that.

Oh, and Ezra of A Boy Named Pip fame sent me like 2 tracks from his Jonny Wow project (at least, that's what Josh said they were from because Josh is so fucking cool and emo and whatever). Anyway, Jonny Wow is officially amazing. And this isn't like all those punk kids who say shit like "Yeah my friend's band is the greatest!" when all their friends do is cover Slipknot tunes or other terrible shit like that. This is the real deal. I don't know what the song is he sent me, but it has a harmonica, and I love harmonicas almost as much as I love crushing the villagers of "Magic Pengel" with my massive penis. I think they're going to be selling CDs soon, and I know, just like last time, I'm going to be the only kid who doesn't get one. God damnit. Also, Josh designed the whole cover and album art, because he's a photoshop whore.

And yeah, I bought like 100+ NES games. I don't have any money now so if anyone wants to fucking buy some Manga then e-mail me damnit. I'm also selling my extra NES and Genesis for like $50 apiece with about 10-15 games if you want in. Mike Pratt and Kenny are eyeing the NES though so make me an offer quick. Anyways... guess I'll see you soon. Long weekend, might have some Ivars related festivities.

A Boy Named Pip links to me, a week later they break up. That's two bands who have been destroyed by linking to me. Well, three's a charm. I'm watching you Skatamatics... and BTW, nice front page you tools.